Lent – My Decision

I had talked yesterday of giving up social media for the 40 days of lent, but then after researching, and prayerful thought, realized that would not be what brought me any closer to my Savior.  What I need is some serious prayer/quiet time each day.

I pray, and try to read the Word daily, but I need some structure to that, some baseline to work from.  So I’ve decided to pick a book of the bible and read through it, a chapter a day, rereading throughout the day as I have time.  For prayer, I need a list.  I used to keep a prayer list/journal and pray through that list every morning, first thing.  That practice died away long ago but it is time to bring it back as a habit.  I think after 40 days it will indeed be a regular part of my day again.

In that quiet time of prayer, I will keep a list of needs and requests that are daily brought to the throne of God when I sit  at His feet.  I have a growing list of the young people that I used to be a teacher and youth helper for, that are heavy on my heart of late.  They will be on my lips every day. As will several other people that I know have strayed and need to return to their faith.

In an effort to also do better at keeping this vessel I travel in, in better condition, I am going to give up the sweets in my daily consumption for the next 40 days.  No more ice cream, cookies or candy.  When I want something sweet I will reach for my sugarless gum.  I will also find something to do for at least 10 minutes a day, toward fitness.  I keep trying to get this started and fail.  But with the focus of a healthier vessel, in caring for the temple that the Lord resides in as I walk with Him, I will be more  inclined to follow through.  Just 10 minutes a day, for 40 days, and I’ll be on my way to a more fit me.  I pray for my health, but do little myself toward it, so why would I expect the Lord to just grant me this prayer when I am not willing to do what I know I should?

Those will be what I focus on through this next 40 days leading up to Resurrection Sunday, in an effort to seek the Lord and a closer walk with Him.

Post A Day 2011

Oh I am such a sucker for a challenge!

WordPress has put out the challenge to bloggers to participate in either Post A Day 2011 or Post A Week 2011.  I’ve opted for posting daily, as I want to get this page going.  So, look for new posts to take place daily of some type, either generated prompts provided by WordPress or from whatever is on my heart and mind.

Thoughts Of A Prodigal

It dawned on  me tonight in the midst of an email discussion..the prodigal son when he hit the bottom, found himself sleeping and eating with the pigs.  I’ve been there, feeling completely unworthy of anything good in my life.  And in that place, that dark, lonely pig sty of sin that I was in, I reflected outwardly what I felt of myself inwardly. And NO one will ever know where I was or how I felt, because no one walked that path with me.  I don’t like sharing about it, it is hard and painful.  I don’t open up easily, though I am trying, about my deep feelings, fears and insecurities.

My writings on my other page did indeed reflect how I was feeling.  I would hope in trying to learn about me, and understand me, people would be able to see just how low I had fallen, so that the comparison of where I am headed will be in stark contrast as a testimony to what God can do once we reach the end of ourselves and come back to Him. It wasn’t a pretty time, and I was not a pretty person, why should I have painted a picture of anything but the reality of who I was in my sin, how I felt about me?  I have SO far to go just to get back up on the path itself 😦  and then find something to hang on too so I don’t fall off again.

But when he came to himself he said, “How many hired servants of my father’s have bread enough to spare, and I’m dying with hunger! I will get up and go to my father, and will tell him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in your sight. I am no more worthy to be called your son. Make me as one of your hired servants.'”

While his father welcomed him back, fully restored, I cannot help but wonder…how long did he feel himself unworthy to be called a son?

How long will I have to wait before I no longer feel unworthy to be called a daughter again?